Sharmaine Poh
single ♥
sweet 17
09/11/1991
Ngee Ann poly
Business Studies

Sunday, August 31, 2008 / 2:01 PM

its time to stop counting the days .

i'm glad we met yesterday . though in the morning , an earthquake struck aljunied's market & later in the afternoon , struck ngee ann city . you were a bastard for being so utterly late ; i'm a whore who started making a scene in public . i'm sorry , really . i should have controlled my anger . but i strongly feel that its only right for me to blow my top . however , once i used my hand to hit you , i knew i was in the wrong alr . no matter how angry i was , i shouldn't have done that . i'm sorry baby :( i promise not to hit you again alright ? you too , ought to promise me that you'll never shout at me in the public again . from today onwards , no nonsense from both of us okay ?

anyway , despite being hurt terribly in the earthquake , we had a great time didn't we ? its been 1 week plus since we last saw each other . all the laughters , retarded-ness & crazy-ness we share . its irreplaceable . as dear babarian sim suffered bruises , scratches , bite-marks (probably by a wild rabbit) & a swollen swollen hand , we took refuge in wen bin's shop at far east plaza . & oh my tian , found out something . his course in SP includes NUDE DRAWING . can you imagine ? they went for an art class or something , a girl was paid to strip infront of them & let them draw her in nude i guess ? i was utterly shocked . like wtf ? somehow , babarian sim was relieved he wasn't in that course . if not , he'd have landed in hospital long time ago ! hahaha . say nice is art , in a bad term , its purely P-O-R-N . pfft .

p.s : i'm glad you're willing to give us a chance to try again . i'm sure this time , we'll never fail . we're going to start afresh . let the past bury itself . no doubt , our past is still gonna haunt us but we'll let time heal everything . for now , i just wanna love you in the best way i can . i hope you will too . our relationship is like a roller-coaster ride , tv seriel drama , we've been through so much so much . we're not going to let it suffer again . we just know that we love each other so much , need each other so much , why force ourselves to leave ? its terrible isn't it silly ? we know we just can't live without each other . i love you baby . hold my hand tight & we'll make it through .

Labels : me . i'm a scene . i'm a drama queen .

Thursday, August 28, 2008 / 5:34 PM

9th day .

work is boring boring boring . i've sat here , facing this damn computer for like 3 hours alr . with completely nothing to do . guess what ? the whole office left only me and a man . damn . this is total crap . half an hour more to the end of my misery :(

anyway , sorry for the lack of updates . don't really have much to say . these few days , i've been feeling alot better . thanks to you . tee-hee D:

i guess after this 1 month of work , i'm gonna shop till i drop can ? plan to do alot of stuff . including high-lighting my hair (since last year i've said until now haven highlight) =.=
hahaha .

okay , i'm pissed . by a phone call . hey , whats your problem ? i never said you can't go his house . did i object ? did i ask you to leave ? i just wanna know who's there . also wrong ? i don't think i did anything wrong okay . ya ya , i know . we're friends now . i don't have the right to know anything . then whatever . jolly well stop sms-ing & we can forget about saturday plans okay ? seriously , you're getting too much . hand over heels with FREEDOM . fuck freedom alrites ? whats the big deal ? you go i also never say anything . what more you want ? you just expect everything you want to be given to you . if you can't do that to others & esp me , don't expect too much from others .

Labels : i'm not dumb enough to be your toy of love ever again . just fuck off & die bastard .

Monday, August 25, 2008 / 7:33 PM

6th day .

只剩下鋼琴陪我談了一天
睡著的大提琴
安靜的舊舊的
我想你已表現的非常明白
我懂我也知道
你沒有捨不得
你說你也會難過我不相信

牽著你陪著 我也只是曾經
希望他是真的比我還要愛你
我才會逼自己離開

你要我說多難堪
我根本不想分開
為什麼還要我用微笑來帶過
我沒有這種天份
包容你也接受他
不用擔心的太多
我會一直好好過

你已經遠遠離開
我也會慢慢走開
為什麼我連分開都遷就著你
我真的沒有天份
安靜的沒這麼快
我會學著放棄你
是因為我太愛你 ♥

Labels : i still love you like i do yesterday .

Sunday, August 24, 2008 / 8:36 PM

5th day .

I can't bite my tongue forever
While you try to play it cool
You can hide behind your stories
But don't take me for a fool .

Labels : its a damn cold night .
how i wish you were here with me tonight .
_______________________________________________________

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days felt like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Did you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it okay
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
they lie on my floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
All I ever wanted it was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe, I need to feel you here with me.

p.s : you can't blame me for hating you sometimes . i just can't understand why are you fucking doing this to me . i need you to know that i do still love you . i miss you like hell everyday . & i'll never give up on us baby .

Saturday, August 23, 2008 / 7:47 PM

4th day .

yesterday night was horrible . had a hard time sleeping & waking up in the middle of the night , staring into the dark blank space . look what you've fucking done to me .

went out with my family today . my father said wanted to bring us to this 'new mall' that we've never went before . had a feeling that it'd be THAT MALL . & guess what ? it is . the central mall at clarke quay . yes , again . exactly the place i went 4 days ago . shopped awhile & my father complained that its boring . so get out of there & went over marina square . yes , again . like i went to marina square 4 days ago too . ate at the same place - KFC . can't help but emo . why does everything have to reminiscene & remind me of you ? i walked & viola , i saw us hand in hand , laughing , looking as sweet as ever . of course , i was just dreaming about the past .

bought like 2 tops ? lols . only thing that made me happy today . thanks mom ! (: sorry to burn a hole in your pocket . hahaha .

sometimes , i see other couples , they can spend everyday with each other for long hours . doing nothing much but just lie in each other's arms & spend the lazy afternoon together . why wouldn't they get tired of each other like how you're tired of spending every day with me ? you are just crapping . you can just fucking say 'you everyday die also must see me meh ? one day never see will die issit ?' bastard .

you're horrible . love is but a game to you . when you feel like loving , you love . when you're sick & tired of love , you just pat your butt & fucking leave . you don't care . i know i have flaws that contribute to the break-up . who don't have ? you mean you're perfect ? you mean you've been fucking good to me ? well , i must admit . you've been a pretty tolerant & understanding boyfriend . i appreciate it . have you ever appreciated me & the things that i've done for you ? just ask yourself . when you're sick , i get worried . i came to your house and took care of you . though i did nothing much , at least i was there for you . when i was sick on one occasion & nobody was at home , you didn't even want to come . i must like beg you to come and accompany me because i felt so sick . once , we were at far east . i suddenly felt very nausea . i said i wanted to sit down & rest . your face turned so black . you were like 'sick go home lah . stay here also no use .' hello . i was nausea . i might vomit anytime . how you want me to walk & take train ? you want me to vomit in front of everybody ? can't you just let me rest first & when i feel better , then head home ? you don't even understand . didn't even showed any signs of concern & carried on being angry with me .

when you were late on our 11 month , you made me fucking angry . yes , you tried to pacify me . i was still angry . in the end , what happened ? as if i had done something wrong , as if i was the one late , you shouted at me in the public , threw your crumpler on the floor , walked away & left me standing in the rain . splendid 11 month huh ? my fault ? yes yes , my fault .

i know i get fucking unreasonable at times & drive you crazy . i expect quite alot from you . but have i done anything that really hurts you & break your heart ? i don't think so . you just keep hurting me over & over again . the 'amelia' incident . the job incident . the class gathering incident . the pageant incident . & all your lies . yes , i know you can use Joshua to counter-attack me . now you know how it feels like when your girlfriend sms other guys behind your back . like how you did that to me in the 'amelia' incident . for your information , you're a fucking lousy liar . & i'm too smart for you please .

class gathering . hello . i asked you to go . you were the one who didn't want to go . so dun fucking say shit like 'i know you don't like to go one . so i say don't want go mah . but you should know i badly want to go right ?' fucktard . if you so badly want to go , then go . i never stop you okay . i wanted to go also alright . you didn't want . so dun try act nice to me & push everything to me , as if i restircted you to go . even if that so , you so interested in who went for what ? have to go search friendster to look for the pictures ? that really made me angry okay .

i know i asked alot from you . things that you're not used to doing & hate to do . like reporting to me & replying me asap . but that gives you the reason to break up with me ? it just goes to show how much you love me lah . yah , you love me but would not like to stay with me . what is this ? why don't you just fucking kill me ?

Labels : there . i feel so much better(:

Friday, August 22, 2008 / 9:59 PM

3rd day .

went out with glenda today . michelle could not make it . to michelle : we understand lah . dun worry ok ? we'll go out tgt soon ! [: hope hong meng is alright . was supposed to meet glenda 2.30 at city hall . but she was a little late . so walked ard raffles city alone first . saw alot of couples holding hands , hugging & kissing . felt very miserable . sat at the staircase outside control station & waited for like 20 mins ? was thinking through alot of stuff ...

anyway , went to frolick to have yoghurt ! super nice ! :D quite expensive though . $4.80 for a medium cup of yoghurt with oreo & strawberry toppings . but nevertheless , quite worth it . cos its really yummy ! haha . thanks glenda for the intro(: jason called & said i got the job . so went down to ngee ann city to sign contract . got to know some stuff . sometimes , ignorance is bliss . know le make myself upset & miserable . actually , i also dunno what i'm upset about . just .. upset .

headed to bugis & showed glenda the yellow dress that i wanted to buy that time . guess what ? dun have my size anymore . damn sad . so i bought another one . design was quite similar but the price not THAT similar . lols . after discount - $44 . quite alright lah . really love it luh . ate dinner at ajisen . its been quite awhile since i last ate there . glenda had a little tiff with her bf . was quite jealous of her . well , at least she has him to send her home & go everywhere she likes . glenda , treasure him ah ! he's a really good boyfriend(:

michelle got hong meng . jiahui got foo hong . glenda got samuel . me ? *sigh* ): i'm used to you carrying my bag for me , holding my hand wherever i go , hugging me in the oh-so-crowded train , ordering my food for me , sending me home & etc . of cos i know all these can be done by other guys too . but its not the same . i only want you . i miss your silly smile , silly face , the silly things you do & everything . though today was enjoyable , i'm not happy . at all . i don't know if all my smiles & laughters were fake today ..

i wonder what are you doing now . are you out with your friends , having fun ? or self-indulging in games at home ? how are you ? perfectly fine without me ? i'm sure you're making full use of the time to do things that you were restricted to do last time . like still awake at 3 am . this is what you want . you chose this path . obviously you're having fun & enjoying . what am i thinking ?

p.s : i didn't know you were that popular in school . not bad uh ? at least got girls noticed you . anyway , you must be glad that tmr you get to go for the job thingy with your 3 good friends & not me . if i knew earlier that i couldn't go , i wouldn't have told you about it . fuck . oh well , have fun tmr then . i can hear your laughter from aljunied . don't ogle too much & bang your head on the wall .

Labels : sometimes , i find myself hating you .

Thursday, August 21, 2008 / 9:16 PM

2nd day .

maple maple maple . just can't seem to stop playing it . hahaha . anyway , girls day out with michelle & glenda tmr(: michelle might not be able to make it . aww ~ she accompanying hong meng to hospital check-up tmr . how sweet ! :D still hope to see you tmr , bitch !

whats with LOVE giving us girls so many problems ? why cant you guys just love us the way we love you ? sigh . falling in love is relatively easy , but staying in love isn't . sometimes we think that the "happily ever after" feeling marks the end of our journey . but true love never lives happily ever after - true love has no ending .

its common for couples to break up & move on to someone new , when they face conflicts or hardships in their relationship . but finding someone else to "fall in love with" isn't the best idea . it can lead to a trail of broken hearts . & if the same attitude is brought into marriage , we can expect the rate of divorce cases in s'pore to only go up .

some people may date for fun & learn the truth the hard way . however , if we choose to brave the storms & work out issues tgt , we'll learn alot about each other through the process . no one is perfect . if you're imperfect , dun expect your love ones to be perfect .

true love does not come by finding the perfect person , but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly .

Labels : damn . i miss you like fuck .

Wednesday, August 20, 2008 / 7:36 PM

1st day .

have been playing maple all day long . damn . that game sure is addictive . have the urge to msg you & ask you how's your test . but .. i know you wouldn't reply . i knew you took up the MRT job & you're planning to ask your friends along . Jason asked if you're my boyfriend . you said no & then yes relunctantly ? cool .

pictures were taken when i was level 78 only .

Labels : goodbye boyfriend ; hello stranger .

Tuesday, August 19, 2008 / 9:13 PM

EXAMS ARE OVER ! D:

yes . the detestable exams are over . had the last paper today - BSTATS . was quite alrites . but died at some theory-based questions . so after the paper , headed to orchard with jia xyn , eileen & yan zhen . had lunch at a jap restaurant at far east . we chatted about our families & alot of stuff(: was quite an interesting chatting session . haha . after that , headed to recruit express at ngee ann city . we are like so hard up for $$ can ? lol . hopefully will recieve a call from Jason soon .

met baby at ngee ann city(: then went to a hello-kitty shop tgt with the girls . the things there are like super super cute luh ! anyway , sorry girls that i ps you all ! =x had my reason . today's quite an impt day for me & baby . *sigh* talking about that gets me all emo .. ]: we got out of orchard & headed to central at clarke quay . the place does holds some fond memories for us . shopped awhile , ate dinner & headed towards marina sqaure . was not feeling very well . i was kinda tired (woke up at 6 am) & my stomach felt funny .

spent a good deal of time at an area outside marina square . sat at the bence & yah .. enjoying the time left for us . talked about some stuff & made promises to each other . the time wouldn't stand still for us , it keeps ticking away and before we knew it , it was going 8 alr . baby's having exam tmr & he haven't study a single shit . sigh . he's always like that . =/ so i just hugged him & couldn't let go . damn sad . cried like mad & still couldn't let go . i know it hurts you to see me like that . i couldn't control my emotions either .. =x so anyway , promised baby that i'd try to be happy & don't think too much . its bad for health . both mentally , emotionally & physically . i guess i need some time to recover . so meanwhile , i hope my friends can bear with me if i were to get all emo/fustrated . haha .

no matter what
i'll stand by you & thats for sure
don't give up on me
i'll give you my word , i won't .

Labels : even though i really love you , its gonna hurts when it heals too .
____________________________________________________

Friday, August 15, 2008 / 10:02 PM

went to watch 'Murder Of The Inugami Clan' . its terrible ]: total waste of my money . anyway , today's econs paper was alright . i thought i would not be able to complete it in time . was rushing towards the end . hopefully , i'll score well(:
tmr having ITB . rawr . hate this module . i'm completely not interested about a single shit on computers and whatever not luh . oh well .. still managed to study & i'll get ready to throw everything out tmr . then my mind will be free of ITB . tee-hee D:
tmr's gonna be so so boring . after the paper , i got church . gotta travel all the way down to kovan & take bus . & because of this , cannot meet baby . i'm dying to spend every single day with him . cos in afew days time , things will not be the same anymore . so i just hope to treasure every minute , every second with him .

♥ 1 year 1 month baby(:

oh well .. gotta go sleep alr . waking up at 6am tmr . damn .

Labels : goodnight world ! [:

Thursday, August 14, 2008 / 7:13 PM

The things that you've said to me in the past :

" Darling , its another huge obstacle we've gone past . so many times le , this kind of things happen . why are we still tgt ? it thanks to your effort . giving me the chance to love you & dote on you . i really really can't lose you anymore , not in anyway . so believe that you're mine for all my life . if you were to run away next time , i'll chain you up & make sure you'll stay with me . darling , its terrible of me to hurt you & make you cry . i'll amend all my mistakes . the special one in our lives are the both of us . ti amo sharmaine :) "

" Darling , i know you feel betrayed . i know you're sad & angry . but let me repay you back can ? my eternal loyalty can ? i can't do anything for what happened last time . i know i'm wrong . for this i pledge to you my love & trust . no one else shall love you more than i do . if you shall decide to leave me , i'll let you go . but i think you'll stay right ? we've gone through so much . the times in school , our o levels & the times we quarrelled so much over so little things . i may not have done alot to keep this relationship but i'm sure you had . would you bear to let go ? if yes , i have nothing to say . but you'll scar me . its like removing something very important to me . darling , i really really treat you as my wife le . so don't leave me please .. :( "

when you went to Malaysia & i folded 189 hearts for you in a day :

" darling .. 189 .. thinking of me 189 times a day ? why you so silly ? make my heart so pain . next time don't so silly le can ? i can feel your overwhelming love . how foolish was i to say all the stupid things to make you sad :( i'd be a fool to let you go . i want you & only you . loving you is an imperative now , can't stop le . darling , i know my mistakes le .. this time i promise to make you happy for the rest of your life . may i have your trust & faith again that i'll always be the one to protect you , cheer you up & encourage you should any problem arise ? love you with all my heart , mind & soul . swear that you'll be my wife , bride & forever love . sorry for all the sufferings & thank you for everything you've done . this will mark a new beginning for us . "

when i asked for break up afew times :

" knowing that you love me so much yet i hurt you deeply & not just once . like i said , loving you is an imperative . i can't stop loving you . face with the seperation , i'm so helpless . i feel so guilty now . just want to say sorry again . i vowed not to make you sad but again , the harm keeps coming . i really am at a loss of words . its all my stupidity that seperated us . how i wish whats done can be undone . i just can't lose you darling . but your decision is made , i can't stop you . but you must know i'll be waiting . waiting for my princess to come back to me .. "

" i know what issit like to lose you . its terrible , really really terrible . darling , i have no one to talk to . its a feeling so so bad , you won't understand . i may just suffer from depression . its not to gain your pity but just to let you know how much i need you . "

Labels : i wish you didn't have to go .
_______________________________________________________

yet another emo post . sorry , i can't help it . its seriously killing me . i know whatever i do or say now , its of no use . your mind has been made up . you had enough of being in love , so now you want to enjoy single-hood . though i still think that its very selfish of you & unfair to me , what can i do ? i'm helpess & at my wits end . i regretted picking up a quarrel with you on THAT sunday . i regretted not saying yes to you when you said : " if you're unhappy , i want you to come back to me . " i regretted not agreeing to you when you said : " let's try again for the last time . " i regret like fuck . its merely afew days & you came with the decision to break up . i know you're tired of our endless arguments & quarrels . i am too . & somehow , i know that this break would do us good . but i just can't bear to let go yet . i can't just watch you walk further & further away from me . why can't anyone understand how i feel ? even you , dear boyfriend . everyone keeps telling me to let go & you keep saying that there're better choices out there . who's there to listen to what i have to say ? yes , letting go seems the best way out since his mind has been made up . yes , there're definitely better guys out there . but thats not what i want . i don't want to have to go . you're forcing me to leave . & i am , forcing myself to leave .

remember the times when we just can't get enough of each other . yearning to see each other every single day , longing to hear each other's voice over the phone & we'll chat for long hours . as the months passed , this routine seems to be a chore . to you , that is . aint me . we'll look forward to each month's anniversary & make it memorable for us . we went to sentosa on our 4th month & spent the whole day at siloso beach watching the sun-set . we sat the cable car , which we both had never sat before & kissed like there was no tomorrow . you piggy-backed me all the way back to harbour front . the times when we spent working at le meridian hotel . after a hard day of work & getting scolded by guests , you hugged me when i cried & told me that if its so hard on me , i don't have to go again next time . & when my legs are tired , you piggy-back me all the way from the hotel right into the train with people staring at us . we'd run for the last train home & smile like a retard looking at the $30 we've earned . all this seems like it'd just happened yesterday . & i thought our love would never end .

when i used to stand at the window and bid you goodbye from 8 storeys high , its a goodbye to the great day we had & i'll be looking forward to the many many great days to come . today , when i did that , its a goodbye to another day we had with each other & the fear of not being able to see you ever again . these few days , i've been emo-ing especially towards the end of the day when you're about to leave & go home . i know you're fustrated & i'll spoil your mood when i do that . but i can't help it darling . it just hurts so much . i dunno how long you'll take to come back to me or worse still , will you ever come back to love me . after all , we still love each other deeply in our heart don't we ? we're just taking a break . but the fear & uncertainty is there . the fear of losing each other during this period & the uncertainty that things will still be the same for us . though i strongly believe that 365 days of love is not so easy to be replaced or forgotten .

whatever it is , i hope i have the strength to pull through knowing that you'd not be here for me anymore . & the fact that our status is different . i really hope that you'd not forget what you've assured me & that i'll be waiting for you . for all the empty promises that you've failed to fulfil , i don't blame you . i don't know if you've ever thought of making up to me but if you have , the best way is just to love me when you come back .

Labels : i'll be loving you , love me .

Tuesday, August 12, 2008 / 10:00 PM

Monday, August 11, 2008 / 10:16 AM

Why can't I just stop emo-ing? fuck.
I hate feeling depressed for the past few days. fuck.
I hate you esp, fucker.
And YOU, I will never forget what YOU did to me. fucker.
Things are just so wrong recently.
I've got no idea why!
Why are y'all doing this to me? fuckers.
I fucking hate y'all.
And I really mean HATE.
It seems like I don't mean anything to you now.
And I hate feeling this. fuck.

Saturday, August 9, 2008 / 7:26 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE !!! ~ D:

haha . just returned home from bugis . wanted to buy lots of clothes . but ended up buying 1 only . ]: saw this yellow dress & i thought it was very nice and sweet looking . baby says not nice so in the end never buy . but i really really like it alot ! shall ask my mama to pei me go there see again , i trust her taste(:

oh well .. today wasnt as great as it was supposed to be .. =/ had some @#$%^ with baby today . *sigh* why can't things seem to be going right for us ? haven't we been trying dear god ? why must you make a fool out of us ? ]: we should have broke up afew months ago . this issue had been going on quite long alr . we just kept delaying & being too soft-hearted to each other . we can't bear to let go . the consequences ? now we find it even harder to let go . its like .. we love each other . but we just can't seem to get along . esp when we quarrel . its terrible i tell you .

anyway , i wanna thank you for being so damn tolerant towards me . so tolerant towards my missy princess temper , my stubborn-ness & unreasonable-ness . everyone can tell that i'm a terrible girlfriend . in a relationship , there's no such thing as 'you're too good for me' , 'i don't deserve you' , 'you deserve someone better.' i hate to hear all these . we both agreed to be in a relationship in the first place so when we break , we must both agree too . to the curious people out there - he did me no wrong . i did him no wrong . we didn't break cos we quarrelled . nothing of this shit happened .. we just thought that its time for each other to enjoy single-hood . you miss it don't you , silly ?

you don't have to worry that people think i treat you not nice thats why we break up . so what if others think of me like that ? does it matter ? as long as you know how i treat you can alr . i don't care about what others think of me . people bet that we'd break after o level . did we ? we made it to our 1st yr 1st month .

Thursday, August 7, 2008 / 8:21 PM

today is me & baby's 1st year 1st month . though we didn't get to see each other today , it's still a great day for us(:

when we first fell in love
i thought nothing could compare
to the magical romance
that you & i had come to share .

but as time passed , feelings deepened
& our closeness grew
the romance turned into
a real & lasting love with you .

there's a special kind of happiness
that only love can bring
& i've found that happiness with you
you're my everything .

♥ xoxo !

Wednesday, August 6, 2008 / 8:52 PM

oh man . OBSE exam is total crap . i can't believe the fucking self-fulfilling prophecy came out ! i didnt study that . ]: fucking 12 marks gone . roars . & yes , the devil's advocate . thats the only conflict resolution techniques that i didnt memorise and it came out ! wtf . another 5 marks gone . *sigh* =/ so anyway , after the paper , ate lunch in school with yan zhen & eileen . headed towards OurSpace to play JENGA :D super fun & exciting can ? haha . i lost 3 times consecutively .

went to meet baby after school today . headed to cathay downtown east to watch 'The Mummy 3' . after that , went back to haising for baby's soccer match . he scored 2 goals ! [: and he dedicated them to me by pointing at me after he scored . cool huh ? called glenda to come and meet me and we had a small chat . so long never see her alr luh . went whitesands to eat dinner and train-ed home with baby . so sorry ! you so tired le still pei me home ! love ya truckloads :D

anyway , tmr is me & baby's 1st year 1st month . & we couldn't get to spend it tgt due to some inconsiderate & selfish people in his class . fucking hell . oh well .. lucky they aint my classmates . so i guess tmr is gonna be a boring boring day for me . ]: OH OH OH . pictures for yesterday :

i swear he didn't know about the sticker i pasted on his hair . XD

Labels : baby , you make my world go round .

Tuesday, August 5, 2008 / 9:05 PM

Monday, August 4, 2008 / 7:59 PM

for this post , i've alot to say . but its definitely not an emo post . its just the way i feel & i hope you'll understand .
you'll prolly agree that so much had happened for the past few months . we've been trying so hard to make things right . there are times when we quarelled , fought and cried . not forgetting the many many times we said 'let's break up lah..' yes , we are indeed very different . apart from our gender , that is . the movies we like to watch , the songs we like to hear are all very different . but all these are just minors . what about our personalities ? you're an extrovert ; i'm an introvert . you enjoy going out in a big group , i don't . so during occasion like christmas , you feel unhappy that you can't get to spend it with your friends . but that's okay , i've been giving in haven't i ? whenever there's a chance , i'd ask if i could join you and your friends .

you'll prolly agree also that we're both hot-tempered & stubborn . we hate to lose in an argument ; we hate to give in . we hate to apologise even when we know we're at fault . this is why we have endless of quarrels and arguments . i admit , i'm mostly at fault . i'm petty , demanding & hard to pacify . i get upset over the slightest thing . & i know this is also why you're tired . don't you think i feel the same way , love ?
we have been trying to be perfect for each other . but the more we try to be perfect , the more imperfect we are . we gave ourselves too much pressure to meet each other's expectations . i know i expect alot & you're not a superman . look , i've been trying very hard as well . i want to make things right & amend all the mistakes i've made . but it seems like , its not only about us anymore . you want your parents to like me . not only i have to meet YOUR expectations of me , i have to meet THEIRS . whats with you father saying 'go find a girlfriend you can control and not a bossy one.' those words came like a knife to me . i didn't know in these days , you still have to seek your parent's opinions to be with a girl you love . okay , i know you're the only child . thats why . but its unfair for them to say that of me . well .. they can't just assume that i'm a terrible girl because of an incident or two when i showed misconduct . & worse still , you can't just say 'sorry , they're my parents . i have to listen to them . ' what is this seriously ? are you being fair to me here ? if they're unhappy with me , i can always change . i'm not as ill-mannered or horrible as they think i am .

for all the times i forgave you & the many chances i gave you , now you're telling me you are tired and you don't wanna be in a relationship anymore ? i'm not a toy . when you had enough , you just throw me aside . you said you aint treating me like a toy , you said you love me . i believe you . really . well , at least prove it . i need your assurance & love so badly baby . 1 year of relationship .. i'm not ready to let go . i'll give you time to think about it .

Labels : & i keep bleeding love .
__________________________________________________________________

ohayo gozaimasu ! ~ D:
there's no school for me today . don't know if its a good or bad thing . i'm gonna be so bored at home luh . i'll prolly be studying for stupid OBSE & much-hated ITB later . *sigh* the thought of exams is stressing me out . baby's having project after school today , so we aint meeting up . ]: anyway , i really pity him sometimes . he lives in Pasir Ris and he has to travel all the way down to Dover everyday . thats not the worse thing . yesterday , he went to WOODLANDS for projects . can you imagine ? =/
he's been complaining about the people in his class too . looks like he don't enjoy being in SP . he likes his course because of psychology only . he says its very interesting . oh mine , can't imagine how is he gonna spend 3 years there ..
i think this whole week i don't have school except on tues (ITB for fucking 1 hour only) & on wed (OBSE exams) . ROAR . sucks big time . the only thing to look forward to in this week is movie with baby on wednesday ! seriously can't wait .
oh well .. i better start revising soon . i won't wanna fail any modules and have a fucked-up timetable next sem . BYE PEOPLE ! ~ D:

Labels : get back together soon ! :(

Sunday, August 3, 2008 / 7:49 PM

Saturday, August 2, 2008 / 2:53 PM

Tried to take a picture of love
Didn't think I'd miss him that much
I wanna fill this new frame
But it's empty
Tried to write a letter in ink
It's been getting better I think
I got a piece of paper
But it's empty
It's empty
Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing is beating our hearts
We're empty
And I've even wondered
If we should be getting under these sheets
We could lie in this bed
But it's empty
It's empty

Like An Angel ♥

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"Love me or hate me ; its your own obsession ."

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make me grow fatter
travel around the world
adidas sports shoe
pink sony digital camera
ipod touch
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trip to liverpool

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